Since Matthew and I have been engaged for a whole week now, I decided that today would be a good day to start trying to figure out what to wear to our big party.
We've already chosen a location for the reception (Earnestine & Hazel's, a former brothel that's Memphis' oldest bar) and the ceremony (the cute empty lot next to said bar) and figured out a democratic way to decide what music gets played. It seems a little crazy - we have six months to get this thing nailed down - but I want to get the planning done so that I can kick back and enjoy being engaged to the most awesome guy ever.
I had started looking at some dresses online, but I didn't really know what I was looking for, so I decided to start by trying a few on. Unfortunately, it's after labor day, and most normal stores don't have a lot of white dresses in stock. Plus, sometimes it's easier to make a decision once you know what you don't like.
With that in mind, I walked into the suburban David's Bridal this morning. That's not quite true. Apparently, you can't just casually stroll into a wedding dress store and poke around a little bit. I was intercepted at the door and offered a seat at the "welcome table". They got my name and asked what my new last name would be, and I realized for the first time that for the rest of my life, I'm going to have to explain how to spell both my first and my last name.
I told the assistant the date of the wedding (March 21), and said that I was just looking, because I had plenty of time. "No, no," she corrected me. "Six months is no time at all! It takes 3 months to get a dress fitted and altered! And you want to look perfect on your special day!"
Anyway, she had me flip through a catalog and pick a few dresses to try on. I picked two - one was a cute tea-length strapless dress, and the other was a big, poofy, trained monstrosity with a sash. Go big or go home, right?
I was passed to a second assistant who found one of the most substantial bras I've ever seen (but um, damn, I looked good) and sent me to a fitting room. It was a little weird - there were no mirrors in the fitting room. I think the theory is that you walk out of the room to your waiting mom and grandma and sisters and then you stand on a platform and everyone cries.
I walked out in the shorter dress, stood on the platform, looked in the mirror and realized that I look cute in tea-length dresses. No one was with me - I didn't realize you were supposed to bring people on the first round.
The second dress was a lot harder to get on. First, the thing was huge. I unhooked it from the hanger and it stood up on its own tulle. I had to climb into the thing clumsily, and then waddle out of the dressing room, trying not to shut the train the door.
I hopped up on the platform, and yet another assistant went and grabbed some tulle that had been glued to a comb (I think it was supposed to be a veil) and stuck it to the back of my head. I looked in the mirror, and I didn't feel any different. It was me, barefoot, in a ginormous white dress, thinking of all the things I could accidentally spill on said dress over the course of an evening.
I couldn't try on any more dresses. They wanted me to, and I made up an excuse, pulled my jeans back on and made for the exit, realizing that this whole idea of what a bride should be just doesn't work with who I am.
Sep 27, 2008
Aug 27, 2008
Coming Soon....Lobster Balls.
In the last installment of "Viet Hoa Fo' Sho", I put the next food item to a vote. Would it be the doughy, frozen chicken and bamboo dumplings? Would it be the curry soup that we apparently all like? Or would it be the lobster balls?
If you said the lobster balls, you're totally right. But here's the thing - I have to work up the nerve to eat them. And when I do, you'll be the first to know.
In non-taste-test news, a lot has been happening. Matthew started working at the Apple store, which means he's not around as much. It also means he gets a sweet discount and to hang out with nerdy people of his ilk all day.
I have a banjo now, and I'm slowly learning to play it. Thus far, I can play most of one Sufjan Stevens song, Bob Dylan's "You Ain't Going No Where", and the very first song I've ever written: an informative ode to supermanning that ho.
We had a rock show in our back yard last week. I made curry for 30 people and three bands played on the porch. If you missed it, don't worry - we'll do it again sometime.
And to those of you who voted for the lobster balls, stay tuned. As soon as the pilot light on my stove gets re-lit, it's on. Aww yeah.
If you said the lobster balls, you're totally right. But here's the thing - I have to work up the nerve to eat them. And when I do, you'll be the first to know.
In non-taste-test news, a lot has been happening. Matthew started working at the Apple store, which means he's not around as much. It also means he gets a sweet discount and to hang out with nerdy people of his ilk all day.
I have a banjo now, and I'm slowly learning to play it. Thus far, I can play most of one Sufjan Stevens song, Bob Dylan's "You Ain't Going No Where", and the very first song I've ever written: an informative ode to supermanning that ho.
We had a rock show in our back yard last week. I made curry for 30 people and three bands played on the porch. If you missed it, don't worry - we'll do it again sometime.
And to those of you who voted for the lobster balls, stay tuned. As soon as the pilot light on my stove gets re-lit, it's on. Aww yeah.
Jul 30, 2008
Viet Hoa Fo Sho: Taste Test No. 4 - Jimmy Carter Would be Proud
This week's offering was a box of popsicles with absolutely no indication of what flavor they might be, save for a picture of a handful of what looked to be peanuts.
Also this week, I decided to do the taste test as a video, so that you could see exactly how the taste test went down:
Viet Hoa Fo Sho: Taste Test No. 4: You got my peanut butter in my freezer from Radio Sweethearts on Vimeo.
I'm still trying to figure out exactly what the popsicles reminded me of. They had one of those flavors that I swear I've had before, but I couldn't put my finger on it. As a whole though, they were delicious, if a bit too rich.
Viet Hoa Fo Sho - Taste Test No. 4 part 2. from Radio Sweethearts on Vimeo.
Next up, it's audience choice!
Here are your options:
- steamed white space pods, er, dumplings, filled with chicken and bamboo shoots
- lobster balls
- Masaman Curry Soup The Taste of Curry That You All Like
Also this week, I decided to do the taste test as a video, so that you could see exactly how the taste test went down:
Viet Hoa Fo Sho: Taste Test No. 4: You got my peanut butter in my freezer from Radio Sweethearts on Vimeo.
I'm still trying to figure out exactly what the popsicles reminded me of. They had one of those flavors that I swear I've had before, but I couldn't put my finger on it. As a whole though, they were delicious, if a bit too rich.
Viet Hoa Fo Sho - Taste Test No. 4 part 2. from Radio Sweethearts on Vimeo.
Next up, it's audience choice!
Here are your options:
- steamed white space pods, er, dumplings, filled with chicken and bamboo shoots
- lobster balls
- Masaman Curry Soup The Taste of Curry That You All Like
Jul 2, 2008
Viet Hoa Fo Sho: Taste Test No. 3: Mommy Drinks Because Job Cries
On Monday, I was sent to Viet Hoa for three things and three things only: chicken breasts, catfish, and eggs. These items together should have cost no more than $15. Despite this, half an hour later, I left the market with $40 less than I had entered with and four bags of goodies.
A trip to the VH doesn't count unless some kind of surprise is brought home.
This week, that surprise was a green bag of cookies from the sweets aisle called "Chlorella Job's Tears Wafer". The only other English on the package was the information on the back (information that I actually took the time to read for once). They include: flour, cornstarch, milk powder, Chlorella powder, sugar, glucose, vegetable oil, Job's tears, leavening agent.
Everything seems normal, except the Job's Tears. I just thought that was the brand - I had no idea it was something that people used for cooking.
A quick wikipedia search reveals the following: Job's Tears is a tropical plant commonly used in Asian food. Matthew was a bit nervous that it referred to the Job of biblical fame, who likely cried because he was infested with all manner of sores, boils and plague.
Having taken a bite, I'm glad it tastes more like a plant, and less like pestilence.
The cookies came individually wrapped for easy lunchbox packing and looked like the creme-and-wafer cookies that my mom used to buy when I was a kid. To be honest, part of why I bought them was because they looked like they might taste like green tea.
I know, I've been misguided in the past when making purchases at the Viet Hoa that look like they would taste like green tea.
Texturally, they were just like those cookies. Granted, the wafter to creme ratio was skewed in favor of the wafer, which is a shame, as the creme is actually pretty tasty. When surrounded by all of that wafer, it's easy to miss out on its subtle sweet, nutty, (and dare I say) green tea flavor.
They were kind of tasty. So kind of tasty, in fact, that I ate more out of the sheer joy that they didn't taste as bad as some of the other things we've eaten.
A trip to the VH doesn't count unless some kind of surprise is brought home.
This week, that surprise was a green bag of cookies from the sweets aisle called "Chlorella Job's Tears Wafer". The only other English on the package was the information on the back (information that I actually took the time to read for once). They include: flour, cornstarch, milk powder, Chlorella powder, sugar, glucose, vegetable oil, Job's tears, leavening agent.
Everything seems normal, except the Job's Tears. I just thought that was the brand - I had no idea it was something that people used for cooking.
A quick wikipedia search reveals the following: Job's Tears is a tropical plant commonly used in Asian food. Matthew was a bit nervous that it referred to the Job of biblical fame, who likely cried because he was infested with all manner of sores, boils and plague.
Having taken a bite, I'm glad it tastes more like a plant, and less like pestilence.
The cookies came individually wrapped for easy lunchbox packing and looked like the creme-and-wafer cookies that my mom used to buy when I was a kid. To be honest, part of why I bought them was because they looked like they might taste like green tea.
I know, I've been misguided in the past when making purchases at the Viet Hoa that look like they would taste like green tea.
Texturally, they were just like those cookies. Granted, the wafter to creme ratio was skewed in favor of the wafer, which is a shame, as the creme is actually pretty tasty. When surrounded by all of that wafer, it's easy to miss out on its subtle sweet, nutty, (and dare I say) green tea flavor.
They were kind of tasty. So kind of tasty, in fact, that I ate more out of the sheer joy that they didn't taste as bad as some of the other things we've eaten.
Jun 23, 2008
Viet Hoa Fo Sho: Taste Test No. 2 - Do the Mantou
For this week's installment of Viet Hoa Fo Sho, we decided to stick with desserts. Granted, after last week, I'm not entirely sure why we would ever want to eat another baked good from the Viet Hoa.
This week's offering was frozen, chocolaty and emotionally conflicted. Behold the chocolate Mantou.
The packaging reminds me of a worksheet I had in my Sociology 100 class. The professor gave us pictures of faces and we had to label the emotion expressed on the face. They were all ambiguous, and I got most of them wrong. I can't tell if these little cartoon mantous are really happy to see me or maniacally angry that I'm about to eat them.
To cook the mantous, we took them out of the freezer, set them in a bowl, spritzed them with water and microwaved them on medium. Sadly, they didn't grow to twice their size or otherwise mutate.
They looked kind of delicious. And edible (which, after that last item, I was thankful that we could at least identify most of the ingredients with a cursory once over).
The good news is that they're not bad. Not as chocolaty as I had hoped for, but not bad. The bad news is that they seem to be mostly texture and no flavor. I'm not sure what it is about these desserts. Is all the spiciness and flavor wasted on curries and ramen noodle seasoning packets?
These tasted less like chocolate cake than a weird combination of bread and spray foam. We did try them topped with whipped cream, which seemed to help the overall consistency.
Like the little mantous on the packaging, I'm conflicted. On the one hand, they weren't the best thing I've ever had. But they weren't terrible, and they sure as hell weren't as disgusting as that thing we ate last week.
I have a feeling that everything we eat will be held to the standard of "It wasn't great, but it definitely wasn't as bad as that green thing."
This week's offering was frozen, chocolaty and emotionally conflicted. Behold the chocolate Mantou.
The packaging reminds me of a worksheet I had in my Sociology 100 class. The professor gave us pictures of faces and we had to label the emotion expressed on the face. They were all ambiguous, and I got most of them wrong. I can't tell if these little cartoon mantous are really happy to see me or maniacally angry that I'm about to eat them.
To cook the mantous, we took them out of the freezer, set them in a bowl, spritzed them with water and microwaved them on medium. Sadly, they didn't grow to twice their size or otherwise mutate.
They looked kind of delicious. And edible (which, after that last item, I was thankful that we could at least identify most of the ingredients with a cursory once over).
The good news is that they're not bad. Not as chocolaty as I had hoped for, but not bad. The bad news is that they seem to be mostly texture and no flavor. I'm not sure what it is about these desserts. Is all the spiciness and flavor wasted on curries and ramen noodle seasoning packets?
These tasted less like chocolate cake than a weird combination of bread and spray foam. We did try them topped with whipped cream, which seemed to help the overall consistency.
Like the little mantous on the packaging, I'm conflicted. On the one hand, they weren't the best thing I've ever had. But they weren't terrible, and they sure as hell weren't as disgusting as that thing we ate last week.
I have a feeling that everything we eat will be held to the standard of "It wasn't great, but it definitely wasn't as bad as that green thing."
Jun 16, 2008
Viet Hoa Fo Sho: Taste Test No.1 - It's all fun and games until somebody eats the sponge
A few days ago, our wonderful friends Brandon and Amanda turned us on to the Viet Hoa Market. They had been exposed to the wonder of the Vietnamese market because of it's crazy cheap food and overwhelming shopping experience.
We went there straight from Brandon and Amanda's, full of excitement and hope for delicious cheap curry and fresh fish. We were expecting good things, but what we found was amazing. The Viet Hoa is the grocery of my dreams. And it is because of this that I bring you my new weekly tribute to my local sketchy dream grocery: Viet Hoa Fo Sho.
This week: Green Spongy Mystery Food.
When I picked up this 89-cent loaf of fun, I thought that it looked kind of tasty, maybe like a green tea-flavored coconut cake. Then I gently pressed down on the top of it. It was bouncy, like Jell-o.
We set a ground rule - the food must be chewed and swallowed. No giving up and spitting it out. The food cannot win.
I took a bite, expecting it to taste like, well, something. Instead, my mouth was assaulted with the texture of fake plastic grass with a piquant styrofoam cup aftertaste. I may forget the taste, but I'll never forget trying to swallow it.
I made Matthew take a bite, and this happened:
He's all smiles now, but just wait until he sticks it in his mouth.
Since the thing was inedible, we decided to perform some experiments:
No.1 - If you can't eat it, befriend it!
It's sponge-like. Can it remove tough stains?
Matthew tried to set it on fire, but instead of igniting, it just smelled like burning plastic. Which lead us to a very important question - was this thing even meant to be eaten?
In frustration, we abandoned it on our back porch. We'll check up on it in a few days. Hopefully, it won't stain the porch or grow to ten times its size.
Next time: Emotionally conflicted cakes.
We went there straight from Brandon and Amanda's, full of excitement and hope for delicious cheap curry and fresh fish. We were expecting good things, but what we found was amazing. The Viet Hoa is the grocery of my dreams. And it is because of this that I bring you my new weekly tribute to my local sketchy dream grocery: Viet Hoa Fo Sho.
This week: Green Spongy Mystery Food.
When I picked up this 89-cent loaf of fun, I thought that it looked kind of tasty, maybe like a green tea-flavored coconut cake. Then I gently pressed down on the top of it. It was bouncy, like Jell-o.
We set a ground rule - the food must be chewed and swallowed. No giving up and spitting it out. The food cannot win.
I took a bite, expecting it to taste like, well, something. Instead, my mouth was assaulted with the texture of fake plastic grass with a piquant styrofoam cup aftertaste. I may forget the taste, but I'll never forget trying to swallow it.
I made Matthew take a bite, and this happened:
He's all smiles now, but just wait until he sticks it in his mouth.
Since the thing was inedible, we decided to perform some experiments:
No.1 - If you can't eat it, befriend it!
It's sponge-like. Can it remove tough stains?
Matthew tried to set it on fire, but instead of igniting, it just smelled like burning plastic. Which lead us to a very important question - was this thing even meant to be eaten?
In frustration, we abandoned it on our back porch. We'll check up on it in a few days. Hopefully, it won't stain the porch or grow to ten times its size.
Next time: Emotionally conflicted cakes.
Jun 13, 2008
Left Behind
On Wednesday, we started the process of moving from my adorable bachlorette apartment into a duplex more suited for two people. It's a three-legged dog of a house. The stairs are wide, then suddenly narrow, no two door frames are alike, and though the bedrooms are tiny, it has the biggest bathroom I've ever seen.
When we first got the keys, we came over and sat on the back porch, eating masaman curry out of the take out container, grinning about the fact that we had a porch.
Seeing the house empty was weird. The two times we had been in before we got the keys the previous tenant had been here. She had a lot of stuff, and it nice to see the house empty and ready for us.
I say empty, but really, I mean mostly empty. She left the fake flower decorations at the tops of the kitchen windows, and a light switch cover shaped like some kind of fruit (I'm not entirely sure if it's supposed to be mango or squash), and a comically nasty hardcore porn movie review magazine on the top shelf in the downstairs bathroom.
We're finishing the move today and tomorrow, and you're all welcome to stop by and have a beer with us or unpack a box on Saturday. There will be a formal new house party later this month.
When we first got the keys, we came over and sat on the back porch, eating masaman curry out of the take out container, grinning about the fact that we had a porch.
Seeing the house empty was weird. The two times we had been in before we got the keys the previous tenant had been here. She had a lot of stuff, and it nice to see the house empty and ready for us.
I say empty, but really, I mean mostly empty. She left the fake flower decorations at the tops of the kitchen windows, and a light switch cover shaped like some kind of fruit (I'm not entirely sure if it's supposed to be mango or squash), and a comically nasty hardcore porn movie review magazine on the top shelf in the downstairs bathroom.
We're finishing the move today and tomorrow, and you're all welcome to stop by and have a beer with us or unpack a box on Saturday. There will be a formal new house party later this month.
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